The original recipe called for carrots, onions and celery, but at one point you’re supposed to strain out most of the veggies and discard them. I’m not down with that version. I wanted all my veggies. And then – tragedy! No carrots to be found! After I stopped crying, I decided to go ovaries to the wall and make it veggie-tastic.

My soup had onions, celery, potatoes, peas and green beans – all thick-cut, because I like it that way. And chicken. And rice. And I also made bread, because I felt I was not getting enough carbohydrates.

And it was FRICKING AMAZING.

Who knew?! Soup is easy and delicious! Soup is so easy that I might make it a Lazy Kitchen staple. Even a lazy cook can make good soup!

Earlier in the week (to celebrate St. Patty’s Day, but not on St. Patty’s Day because we couldn’t wait that long) my boyfriend made a boiled meal, complete with corned beef and cabbage and potatoes and carrots. We had some left over veggies and plenty of broth – which we saved, being forward-thinking folks – and tonight I made soup. For a second time!

Last time, I used some soup broth to make rice, but this time I used to to make shells. Who doesn’t love shells?! The beauty of it is that when you’re done cooking the pasta, you don’t even have to strain it – you just pour the whole kit ‘n’ kaboodle back into the pot. It’s a lazy cook’s dream.

Another change was that this time we had carrots – yay! – and I also used cut-up chicken breasts instead of shredded thighs. I left the chicken pieces pretty big, figuring if chunky veggies were delicious chunky meat probably would be too. Wrong. The big chunks are a little dry, so next time I’ll probably cut them smaller.

Again: IT WAS SO GOOD! And I don’t even care that it’s warming up outside and you’re not “supposed” to be making hearty soups anymore. It’s still cold in the apartment and so…it’s still hearty soup season here! Three cheers for hearty soup!

Things did not go exactly as planned. To start, I didn’t get in gear on making these until well after midnight on March 18th, so technically I missed making them for Green Day St. Patty’s. Also…I botched them in an incredible horrible way that I’m still baffled by and, thus, am unable to resolve for next time.

To begin, I didn’t have the mint chips that she used – though, hello, mint chips?! my kitchen needs these ASAP! – so I added 1 tsp of mint extract and it gave the brownies a really light, minty flavor that I loved. I ended up just using semi-sweet chips instead, so these puppies were PACKED with chocolate and also tasted like mint – how could something so right go so wrong?

Well. I don’t know.

I cooked them for about 35 minutes, as recommended, and they puffed up to ENORMOUS proportions. Like a loaf of bread. But brownies. They also got a lovely light brown “shell” on top, but inside they seemed…extremely gooey. My boyfriend suggested that they were perhaps dramatically under-cooked, but if I’d left them in any longer the edges would have started to burn (gross). Also, the middle seemed too firm to be under-cooked, but it’s definitely too gooey to be fully-cooked. Right?

Another theory was that maybe the gooeyness was from all the extra chocolate chips I used. Like, maybe they melted and that’s where the goo is coming from? Bakerella’s mint chips didn’t melt, so hers were significantly less gooified than mine. Although, there are still full, unmelted chips in my brownies, so maybe that’s not the reason?

The whole kerfluffle is kind of a moot point, because I’m for sure going to eat these bad boys anyway (chocolate! mint! goo!). I will probably keep them in-house, though. Mostly to avoid embarrassment; it’s one thing to eat minimally baked brownie batter in the privacy of my own kitchen, but quite another to give it to someone else, especially when I can’t explain exactly what went wrong.

Any ideas? Insight? Wisdom? Help!

The highlight of the meal, for me, was probably the bread. Oh man. OH MAN. I forgot to ask them who supplied their breads, but whoever it is…please allow me to bow at your feet. Wowza. Like I said, it was good. Really, really good.

The lunch menu is, presumably, smaller and cheaper than the dinner menu but there were still lots of choices and we both found ourselves saying, “oh, I want this one…no, this one…no, that…no, maybe this…” and then making a gut decision when the waitress stopped by. I had the BLT and he had the crab sandwich.

I forgot to take pictures until we were almost done - oops!

My BLT was pretty good – awesome bread, thick bacon, just the right amount of mayo (“aioli” is what they called it, but let’s be real…it’s mayo). The fries were pretty good, too.

A mini-annoyance: On the menu it said that they used “local tomatoes,” which struck me as weird considering I don’t think anyone local is growing tomatoes yet, but…whatever. Also, everything on that sandwich could/should be local, but if the tomatoes is all they’re willing to do that’s OK. Baby steps, Casbah.

He toughed it out and ate most of the sandwich, mayo and all.

Joe was pretty disappointed with his sandwich. It was too fishy-tasting to me (blech, seafood), but what really got him was all the mayo. He assumed (incorrectly) that it would be sort of like a crabcake sandwich and not a crab salad sandwich and his hatred of mayo is just about in proportion with my love of it, so…you can imagine. Still: really good bread, and that bites that didn’t have a ton of mayo in them he seemed to like.

We skipped dessert and went across the street to Oh Yeah! for ice cream, but it was a nice lunch for under $20 and overall a good first experience. We’ll definitely be back – who knows when, since it took us six months to get there the first time, but…eventually. Baby steps!

To start, I had the sausage-stuffed mushrooms and he had crab lumps – not cakes, exactly, but little pyramids of light, delicate crab meat and a honey mustard-ish sauce. I don’t even like seafood and I thought they were pretty yummy. My mushrooms were good, not too wet or dry, bubbly cheese on top. After I’d eaten a few, though, they began to taste more and more salty.

We also got bread and dipping oil. Mmmmmm. Bread.

For dinner, I had the roasted garlic chicken pasta with red pepper fettucine, which was very good. The pasta didn’t have much of a red pepper taste to it, but it was delicious anyway. The chicken was tender, the garlic melted in my mouth. It was supposed to have red peppers in it and I was a little sad at how few there were (just two little slices!) and it needed salt and pepper, but otherwise a good dish.

He had one of the dinner specials, some kind of Hawaiian white fish with a nut crust and a citrus-pomegranate sauce. The sauce was pretty tart, a little weird for me, but the fish seemed good (like I said, I don’t generally eat it at all). He also got wild mushroom risotto with it – and that was GOOD, but not a good pairing for the light fish and fruity-sourness of the sauce.

A table of older ladies was next to us and they chatted the whole time we were there about their lives and their news. It was pretty hilarious. You can have a good dinner without some good eavesdropping, right? (Old ladies like to talk about sex. And they smoke pot. Who knew?)

All told, a delicious dinner, more extravagant than our usual fare (as is only appropriate, given it was to celebrate my 25th year of living). CC’s Cafe wasn’t perfect, but it’s no Olive Garden, for sure. You wouldn’t have to twist my arm to get me back there!

We opted to skip dessert (only 1 chocolate offering? yeah, right) and headed to Gullifty’s across town. I got a sinful triple chocolate mountain and Joe had key lime pie. Both good, as expected.

Dinner? Cake? Made by someone else? No dishes to do? I guess you could say 25 is off to a pretty nice beginning.

I knew immediately what we’d be having for dinner that night (Dinosaur Macaroni and Cheese) and the boyfriend suggested we also add sloppy joes to the menu. I countered with canned green beans (the boy has a fondness) and pretty soon we were both 8 years old again, reliving the best meal from childhood.*

It’s important, I think, to follow up a sucky experience with a super awesome experience, and joes ‘n’ mac was definitely the way to go. Plus, we all know macaroni and cheese tastes better when it’s in fun shapes!

*This was also my favorite meal from graduate school. Gotta love eatin’ on the cheap!

Spoiler alert: Mine don't turn out like this.

Image from PKU Recipes, which has a recipe for samosas that sounds manageable. Ugh.

So my boyfriend’s been in kind of an Indian mood lately – which is fine by me, I love Indian cuisine. The other day, though, we started thinking: for what we’d spend on ordering Indian, we could probably make it. (And when I say, “we,” what I really mean is, “he.”)

Sunday turned out to be Indian Food Day in our house.

I did not go into this experience with the right mindset. I know that now. What I wanted to do was nap, maybe play a little Tetris, and let him work his culinary magic solo. But that turned into, “hey, honey, why don’t you come keep me company?” and that turned into, “want to mix up the dough for these samosas?” and that turned into, “want to make the samosas?”

The things we do for love, right?

Not only was I (more or less) conned into making them, I had possibly the WORST RECIPE IN THE WORLD guiding me. I’m at a Samosas 101 level. This recipe, I’m pretty sure, is for people who already know what they’re doing and just need a reminder about the order. Or a good laugh at someone else’s expense (ie, mine).

Some ranting and photos after the jump.

Here’s what I had to work with:

For Cover:

1 cup all purpose flour (Maida)
Water to Knead dough
2 tbsp oil
Little salt
1/4th tsp Ajwain (optional)

• Mix all the ingredients (salt, oil, ajwain) except water. (TLK in: notice you don’t have to mix in the flour! jeez!)
• Add a little water at a time.
• Pat and knead well for several times into a soft pliable dough.
• Cover it with moist Muslin cloth and keep aside for 15 minutes.

I just kept thinking: how much water? is this enough water? how do I know when it’s enough water? And meanwhile I’m slowly getting covered in sticky dough and flour. Thank goodness for those 15 minutes because I needed to regroup. (And I’m sure I didn’t add enough water.)

My boyfriend was nice enough to mix the samosa filling for me, so all I had to do was worry about stuffing them. Which, by the way, is REALLY REALLY HARD.

The directions say:

To Proceed:

• Make small rolls of dough and roll it into a 4″ – 5″ diameter circle.
• Cut it into two parts like semi-circle.
• Now take one semi circle and fold it like a cone. Use water while doing so.
• Place a spoon of filling in the cone and seal the third side using a drop of water.
• Heat oil in a kadhai and deep fry until golden brown.

AGAIN WITH THE WATER. How does one “use water while doing so,” anyway? And seal with ONE DROP? Yeah right.

Let me summarize: this recipe sucks and I hate samosas.

I bumbled through the rolling and coning and stuffing and sealing process. I guess I just sort of made it up as I went along, splashing water everywhere, getting flour on everything, smashing the dough around in the my hands like I could show it who was boss through brute force. (Unsuccessfully.)

YOU'RE UGLY INSIDE AND OUT.

Finally I had nine lop-sided, lumpy, ugly samosas ready to be fried. I also had flour all down my front and a flour-water clay drying on my hands. And a huge mess all over my workspace.

I HATE STUPID SAMOSAS.

I left the boyfriend handle the frying so I could chip the dough off my fingers, the rolling pin, the table, etc. It seemed a little too much to hover over the frying pan cackling about the misfortune of those evil little cones – but I considered doing it, just the same!

I think it's good and dead.

While I fretted and griped over those stupid samosas, the boyfriend made channa masala (delish), chicken curry (double delish) and basmati rice (triple delish). We also had some garlic naan that he didn’t make, but he did buy it from the Indian grocery, so I’m giving him credit for it just the same.

The samosas, I thought, were the worst part of the meal. That stinks as far as my delusions of being a contributing member of our relationship goes, but it also helps to reinforce my belief that the kitchen is his domain.

I have learned that samosas are a lot of work and are better made by somebody else – like my boyfriend. Or a professional. Or anyone who is not me.

…Preferably while I nap.

Start out with your shredded potatoes. I used two redskins for two servings and the portions were just fine, but maybe you like bigger or smaller. I don’t judge.

Note that I didn't bother to peel them - doesn't make a bit of difference.

Then use a cloth and your brute strength to squeeze all the moisture out of the potatoes and add your flour and spices.

I went with lots of garlic and a little basil and salt.

Mix and toss the whole shebang into the microwave. See, I told you this was easy!

When it’s done, spread a nice thin layer of potato in your hot oil. (Seriously, the thinner the better. Mine was gloppy and thick and that was a MISTAKE.) Let it get brown and crispy then flip to the other side.

Mine is shaped a little like a lumpy Texas.

Once both sides are done, you’re ready to eat. I had mine with sausage and eggs and a glass of Simply Apple.

DON'T FORGET THE KETCHUP!

There’s seriously no excuse to not make these every day. Or, okay, every weekend at least. The only way hash browns get easier is if you buy them frozen or order them at Denny’s.

Recipe (and some admissions of screw-ups – jeez) after the jump.

Perfect Hash Browns
(adapted from eHow)

Ingredients:

• 2 medium potatoes
• 1-2 TB oil
• Salt
• Pepper
• 2 tsp flour (whoops, just realized I used 2 tablespoons – don’t do that!)
• Spices – go crazy! Try any combination of paprika, onion or garlic powder, Italian or poultry seasoning mix, herbs, etc, etc.

Directions:

• Grate the potatoes on a sharp grater, medium sized shred.
• Drain the potatoes and put them in either double thickness paper towels or a clean dish towel and wring as much moisture out as possible.
• Put the dry shreds back into the glass bowl and microwave for about 2 minutes- long enough to half-cook but not cook fully
• Heat the oil in a large skillet, preferably cast iron or nonstick, on medium-high heat. While the pan is heating, mix the desired seasonings with the flour, and stir into the hot potatoes. (OK, I messed that part up too – added before the microwave. Well, whatever. They were still delicious.)
• Throw the potatoes in the the pan while simultaneously dashing away to avoid getting burned.
• Cook on the first side for about 10 minutes, or until browning at the edges, then flip and cook on the second side for about 5 minutes, or until lightly browned.
• Season with salt and pepper to taste. Sprinkle lightly with cheese (if desired…I didn’t).
• STUFF THEM IN YOUR MOUTH* AND ENJOY!**

*Don’t do that. They’re pretty hot.
**Definitely enjoy them, though. That’s the point.

Step One: Go to Vanilla Pastry Studio.

Step Two: Buy a bunch of cupcakes. (Half a dozen will do, I suppose.)

Step Three: Marvel at the beauty of your chosen cup o’ cake.

(I chose chocolate peppermint – it was a GOOD CHOICE.)

Step Four: You’re not done yet! I said MARVEL!

Step Five: Jam that sucker in your mouth. Or eat it in a bowl with a spoon, if you’re classy.

Vanilla is easily the gold standard for cupcakes in the city of Pittsburgh.* The “sugar fairy” gimmick I could see as getting a little obnoxious over time, but as long as they keep creating such moist, delicious little cakes topped with such fluffy, delicate mounds of heaven icing, they can call themselves whatever they want.

Like “genius.” Or “goddess.” Or, okay, “sugar fairy.”

*They don’t even pay me to say stuff like this! But, hey, Vanilla…if you’re listening…WILL WORK FOR CUPCAKES!

Wouldn’t it be fun, I thought, to document my kitchen successes and failures? To see which of my many shortcuts worked and which turned out to be a complete disaster? If you can’t laugh at yourself, you have no business laughing at anyone – and when I’m in the kitchen, laughter abounds!

So here we are at The Lazy Kitchen. I’m not in the kitchen yet because, well, I’m too lazy to cook anything right now…but stay tuned. No doubt there will be plenty of entertainment to come.